I want you back

I have been working on this lyric, I am still not satisfied with the structure. I consulted with Nigel but his suggested structure ruining the flow.

My current (original) lyric is as follows,


I Want You Back

Chorus1
I want you to bring back
All your dreams, blue and black
I want you
I want you back
I want you
I want you back

Verse1
It’s strange
We just shared pains
we were wild
& we didn’t tame
each other
Like lovers

Chorus
I want you to bring back
All your dreams, blue and black
I want you
I want you back
I want youI want you back

Verse2
And in this foolish game
Everything seemed fake
Its like we dreamt a dream
while we’re awake
We lived in heaven
and we transgressed

Bridge
But its never late
Its never late
If we learn from mistakes

Chorus
I want you to roll Babe!
Dice of hope for love's sake
I want you
I want you back
I want you
I want you back

________Nocturnal

NEW SONG LYRIC

VERSE1
Charming rose!
I hate your thorns
Spiteful
Like the devil’s horns
May you die
In the storm.

VERSE2
Jesus, Lo!
In the Holy Rome
Devil sits
On Nero’s throne
Who fiddles while
Faithful moan.

CHORUS
Lions of lust
Devour my heart
Paws of conscience
Tear me apart
Scourge of remorse
Whips me hard.

VERSE3
Moses, Don’t
get me wrong
I can’t wander
Just that long
Could you & Yahweh
build me home.

CHORUS
Lion of lust
Eats my heart
Paws of conscience
Tear me apart
Scourge of remorse
Whips me hard.

Bridge (solo)

Lion of lust
Eats my heart
Paws of conscience
Tear me apart
Scourge of remorse
Whips me hard.


_________NOCTURNAL